I am reading this book about attachment types. I have an anxious attachment style at the moment. They can change over time. Depending on what I choose to act on, on what I choose to think and to feel, my attachment style can change. That brings me to my point. Everything is a choice or… Continue reading Everything is either a choice or a decision
Author: Eliza
In the end we feel the same
I know this for some time now, but I keep learning it. There's such a relief in knowing that no one really knows how to win at life. Because it's made of moments, good, better, learning moments. And the relief comes from the certainty that we all have fears and happiness, anxiety and thrill, sadness… Continue reading In the end we feel the same
Today I decide
To tell myself all the things I waited a lifetime for others to tell me. And to be honest, now I don't even understand why I waited. It was clear that I had it all in me, since I wanted others to see it and tell it to me. So today I say: I am… Continue reading Today I decide
I know I am not alone in thinking that I have contradictory thoughts and feelings. For example, while I do believe that friendships die of their own accord, because we lose common points with people or because we can't keep everyone in our lives, people will also hear me say that I simply cannot give… Continue reading
I always avoid going running. And I don't think it's because I don't like it, but because I feel self conscious about my body. It just now dawned on me, that most likely, everybody else who's out there running, either feels the same way as I do, or they just don't care about how my… Continue reading
I was right
When I told myself I just need to get through the day. That, and a very good cry. A very very long and full of snot kind of cry. So now I have puffy eyes and a headache. But somehow I feel better.
Today I wanted to run away but I stayed put
Today I wanted to give in to self pity, to wallowing, to self deprecation of the worst kind. Instead, after crying for a few minutes, I wiped my tears away, I put on an audiobook and I realised that although wallowing has its benefits, I will love myself more for caring deeply about my thoughts… Continue reading Today I wanted to run away but I stayed put
We get together again, as if this is another life. Not because it has been too long, but because it was just long enough for me to be someone else. I have of course, the same face, maybe just a bit rounder, and you look at me seeing the same little girl. You judge me… Continue reading
There are days when human interaction is exhausting. Even if the human in question is a person you really love. It could be that you don't like them anymore although bonds like blood and time still bind you tight. It is hard to find the balance, to not snap, to think of moments in the… Continue reading
Growing up, I felt like I was terribly unloved and that I was alone in this feeling. I think one of the most heartbreaking feelings is when you expect love from your parents and that love doesn't arrive ( how the love is actually there but we can't see it is a story for another… Continue reading